Jim and I have known each other for about 4 years before we took the venerable vows to be there for each other. Without hesitation, we made this promise out of deep love but neither of us knew that our vows would be tested this hard, and this early.
While the national average for divorce is about 50%, the divorce rate amongst couples with lupus is higher at about 83% -- and it's easy to see why. Lupus is an unusually cruel disease, not only to the Lupie but also to all of Lupie's loved ones.
As my husband, Jim became my prime caregiver. And he endured a lot.
He endured the grind of being a daily caregiver.
He endured all my anger.
He endured all manifestation of my disability.
He endured my depression, mood swings and suicidal thoughts.
He endured lack of sleep.
He endured my delirium.
He endured the loss of a woman he married.
In my darkest and loneliest moments, Jim was there with his loving heart and open arms. When the tears rolled down my eyes because I was in so much pain, both physically and emotionally, his knowing squeeze of my hand relieved me more than any painkillers.
No matter how ugly the disease was or how ugly it made me, inside and out, Jim stayed true to his vow. And I thank him for teaching me how powerful love can be. I am not sure what life has in store for me but I am glad that I will be making the journey with my hubs.
 |
| I will be your penguin |
Linda, you have been amazing through all this. I wish I could give you more relief. I love you.
ReplyDeleteI cried when I read this. So much love and admiration for you both.
ReplyDelete